A Magical Tale

Magic! I love when pure magic happens.

I had dinner with my cousin last night and we were talking about how God/Source/The Universe and our ancestors communicate with us.

We shared some wild serendipitous stories of divine intervention. He said he’s learned that if he drops something twice, it’s a message, so he stops and asks, “Ok Grandma, what am I supposed to see?” One time it was an iron that was still plugged in.

I’ve learned that when I get a shrill tone in my ear that it’s an incoming message. I stop, take a breath, and say to my guides – “what’s the message?” And I get it.

I was driving home and my cousin calls me to share another fun story. I had just been thinking about a story so I told him about it:

One morning many years ago when I was outside meditating and the wind was WILD. I felt my dad’s spirit and I heard him say “I’m in the wind today, baby.” He called me baby a lot, in that casual cool guy tone. I loved it. I said, “Oh Dad, that must be so cool to be in the wind.” I LOVE a windy day. Wouldn’t it be cool to fly around in the wind?!

That was super cool. But there’s more…

So I get in the car a few hours later and a song starts playing. That was weird. Where did it come from?! It was a rental car and I had not hooked my phone up and I was very confused. I pick up my phone to investigate and somehow it had automatically connected to the car stereo (this had never happened before or since), it had “randomly” connected to my Apple Music library which had about 3 albums on it because I had used it for a minute when it first came out but never again. And guess what?

You know where I’m going with this don’t you? The song was “In The Wind”, by Lord Huron. Yes it was! I kid you not.

How in the world did my phone connect to the car without prompting and how in the world did it go to Apple Music, which I never used, and how in the world did it go to that song?!

Well. Magic, of course. My dad was talking to me.

But that’s not all.

I texted my sister a bit later and said “Hey! Dad told me this morning that he’s in the wind today.” She texted back something to the effect of “get the hell out of here! Hold on!..” Then she sends me a photo of her journal entry that morning.

She had been walking in the woods at our family farm that morning and laid on a log to rest. A strong wind came up, “like she had never felt before”, she wrote. She had a knowing that it was Dad and he told her it was time for her to move back to the family land and start a farm.

WHAT?!

She did, btw. That message from Dad started her plan in motion and now she lives there and is regenerating the land and sells the most amazing chicken and eggs!

So I’m telling this story to my cousin last night and right at this very moment a rainbow appears in front of me, directly over the highway! It was undoubtedly my dad appearing to say hi to us. We were in awe. It was so special.

So I told him a second story of when my dad’s spirit came to visit, and then a SECOND rainbow appeared!

Yes it did.

And you know what? The minute we ended the call, the double rainbows vanished.

My cousin and I were saying that magic happens all the time, all around us, but we’re often so caught up in the noise and distractions that we don’t see it. Or we try to explain it away- “just a coincidence.”

But if you tune into your knowing, you feel it. You feel the truth. You know it’s real, in your gut or in your heart.

So here’s to magic. May we never be too busy, too caught up in the noise, or too jaded, to miss it.

Wholeness Over Goodness

I had a phenomenal week! Holy cow!

I went to Boone, NC last Friday to the Art of Living Retreat Center (that place is amazing – check it out!) to a 3-day workshop called “Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness”. It was hosted by Elise Loehnan and Courtney Smith (more on these phenomenal women below). I would venture to say that it was hands down the best event/workshop/retreat/thing I’ve ever been to! IT.WAS.BONKERS good!

The weekend was based on Elise’s recent book “On Our Best Behavior: The Price Women Pay to be Good”. The book is, as Elise says: “an exploration of the Seven Deadly Sins—ancient ideas of morality that still control and distort women’s lives today—revealing how trust in our natural instincts can return us to a more balanced, peaceful, and spiritually complete way to live.” Elise hooked up with her friend Courtney, who is a consultant, group facilitator and coach…THE BEST group facilitator I have ever experienced!

We identified 3 stories that are charged for us – that are causing angst and holding us back from our fullness. Old stories that are no longer serving us. Then we learned and practiced tools to de-program these limiting beliefs.

We looked at:

• our conditioning and unconscious choices

• the facts vs stories that we make up in the situations and circumstances that are causing us pain and suffering

• how we choose to play victim, hero, or villain in different situations and how that keeps us stuck

• how we do or don’t take accountability for situations in our life. Where do we give our power away?

• the many parts and personas that we play and how they both help and hinder us

We practiced somatic tools to connect with the sensations in our body and how those sensations are a guide to YOUR truth.

We rewrote our old stories and limiting beliefs.

All of this over 3 days with about 40 women.

Listen…a group of women in a room is SO powerful.

There’s nothing like it. The level of vulnerability and honesty and acceptance and understanding in that room allowed us to go deep and be real, with ourselves and others. It allowed us all to lay down our arms, to take off the masks, to really get to the very heart of the matter. We realized that we often feel alone in our struggles, but that they are felt by so many other women! It felt good to hear “me too.” Sharing the stories you tell yourself is powerful!

If you’re craving that…read on…

I asked a question in hour one and Courtney asked if I’d come up and work through it with her using one of the tools she taught us. I’m not gonna lie, it was unnerving to be the first to stand in front of a room full of strangers and talk real. To risk sounding stupid.

You know those little voices that you keep to yourself because you think they’re crazy and you know they aren’t really true, or worse yet – maybe they ARE true? And you push them aside but they keep haunting you?

You know those thoughts, right?

Well I said them OUT LOUD. In front of 40 strangers! Then another woman did. Then another and another. And our power grew. The grip of these stories released.

Over the rest of the weekend so many women thanked me for being the first, for sharing my story, for being real. So many said they resonated with what I said and it made them feel better to know they aren’t alone. It made me feel better too.

That’s the power of group work.

By the last day we were all clamoring to stand in front of the group and be coached by Courtney. To be witnessed in our vulnerability and struggle. It’s freeing to say those thoughts out loud to another person. You think it’s gonna make you puke. You think it’ll pull you under. But it makes you free. Keeping them in the shadows makes them grow and get stronger. Their strength holds you down.

It was so moving to hear people’s stories and we all found at least some resonance within each story shared. Even if our life circumstances were different, our feelings and thoughts had so much in common.

I feel like I got back to the root of who I am. I felt her again. I got past all of the societal expectations, all of the expectations I have of myself that are total bull shit, all of the stories I was telling myself that aren’t really true – they’re just fear talking. It feels so liberating to get out from under all that muck. Soooo…

I AM INSPIRED TO HOST A WORKSHOP LIKE THIS HERE!

WANNA COME?

I’m hammering out details now.

If you are looking for transformation, if you want to get your groove back, if you want to rewrite some old stories that you’re entrenched in…

Comment on this post and I’ll put you on the list and share details as they unfold.

I also do this work in 1:1 coaching, which is amazing and transformative too. But let me tell you, doing it in a group of women is next level.

IT’S TIME FOR WOMEN TO RISE!

No more living out old stories and narratives that keep us small.

The world needs you standing in your power.

You’re here on this earth right now for a reason.

Your family needs you, your neighbors need you, your friends need you, your clients need you, your company needs you.

YOU ARE NEEDED. In your fullness.

It’s my dream for us all to step into the fullness of who we really are and I am committed to offering the space to help you do that.

Ostara Season

We enter the season of Ostara on The Celtic Wheel this Tuesday, March 19, The Spring Equinox.

Ostara is about new beginnings, birth and renewal, planting seeds- spiritually, mentally and physically.

The energy of this season is about coming alive, expansion and fully embracing your YES!

New cycles begin. There is a sense of endless potential.

Where do you want to turn your attention in this next cycle? What new beginning is calling you? What wants to come alive? How can you express your YES!?

For the next 6 weeks we are invited to notice and explore the themes of the natural world and how they are reflected in us. The natural world is a mirror for us. As without, so within.

If you’d like to dig into these seasonal themes more deeply, and in community, join my Ostara Zoom group on 3/27/24. I’d love to have you in the circle.

Magical Thinking

Has anyone ever accused you of “magical thinking”…and not in a good way, but with a derisive tone?

This term really gets my goat. Big trigger for me. It’s said by someone who’s scared and stuck to someone who isn’t afraid, as if the fearful way is truth and you’re delusional and ignorant.

Here’s how I see it – the only way you’re gonna to be happy and fulfilled, the only way the world elevates, is with magical thinking. Magical thinking is good. Magical thinking is imperative.

Thinking thoughts that seem crazy and hair-brained, thinking outside the box. Thinking thoughts that might not make sense. Believing things that you feel in your heart but there isn’t data yet to prove it. Believing that ANYTHING is possible…

That’s all “magical thinking”.

And it leads to innovation and self-actualization.

It’s the path to happiness. It’s the path to creative problem solving and elevating the world.

When we force ourselves to stay within the confines of “practicality” (often the term used as an antonym to magical), we might reject our calling.

We think “I can’t make a living doing what I want to do so I’ll settle for this job I hate because I get a nice paycheck and benefits.”

We think “I’ll just do what everyone else is doing because that must be safe.”

We think “I don’t know where this idea/desire/wish/dream is leading so I’ll just stay here.”

We shut down our fire. We shut down our creativity. We shut down our vitality.

NO! That shit has got to stop.

Believe you are capable of adapting and thriving, no matter what the path holds. Believe in your scrappiness. Believe that the things you love, your gifts, what lights you up – THAT’S what the world needs. The world needs you to be lit up and alive.

Believe that the path you truly WANT is the path that makes the MOST sense. Even if it doesn’t seem “practical”. Even if you don’t know where it’s going to end up.

If you’re feeling the pull, that’s the path.

It takes trust. It takes faith. It takes courage and conviction.

And it’s imperative. And you’re capable.

Don’t let the nay-sayers snuff out your fire and shut you down.

Believe in magic.

Magical thinking has gotten me everything good in my life. Magical thinking helped me take leaps that made no sense. Magical thinking led me to adventure and deep joy.

I’ve worked with too many grown adults who followed the safe and “practical” path and ended up miserable. Who are afraid to put their gifts out there. Who get stuck looping on all the what-ifs and doubts and fears.

Do not do this to yourself. And do not impose your fears onto our children.

Magic scares stuck and fearful people. It’s why they burned the magical women. It’s why we turned away from it.

But it’s high time we believe in magic again.

I WANT my daughter to be a magical thinker. Magic is empowering. Magic makes the “impossible” possible. I want the fearful stuck and miserable people to think she’s crazy. Because that means she’s alive. That means she’s fearless and free. That means she refuses to settle for the status quo.

And that means our world will change for the better.

AMEN! <she says with a red face and sweaty brow>

Now I’m gonna step off the podium and take a drink of water cuz I got myself REAL wound up.

If you are longing for magic, if you want fearless & free…come work with me. Schedule a discovery call and we’ll talk about what you want and if I’m the right witch to help get you there.

Photo: hans isaacson, via unsplash.com

Imbolc & Ancestor Guidance

I’ve been drawn to my ancestry lately. They’re coming to me in different ways.

I’ve been called to the healing of herbs and Bach remedies, which come from the English countryside. I’ve no doubt it’s the wisdom and practices of my ancestors calling to me. It’s a remembrance deep within my cells.

We carry our ancestor’s trauma, wisdom, and resilience.

It’s no coincidence that these themes are coming to me during Imbolc season on The Celtic Wheel, which runs from Feb 1 - the Spring Equinox. The bear is the animal spirit of the season – the ancestor of the land and master of herbs.

The fir is the tree of Imbolc – alignment, hope, endurance.

What is catching your attention lately? What do you feel drawn to?

That’s the invitation of Imbolc season: Listening to the quiet stirrings within you. This is not the loud, active fire of the summer season. This is slow and quiet.

Can you open to the inspiration that comes in the dark still whispers of midwinter?

Can you clear the noise and listen? What’s calling you?

If you’d like some guidance on moving through this Imbolc season with intention, soulfulness & some witchy magic, schedule a free discovery call with me and we’ll work out a juicy plan for you!

PS: Those are my actual ancestors! 1/3 of the huge photo of the Taylor Family Reunion in 1930.

2024 Words

Do you choose a word of the year? I could NEVER pick ONE word for the year. A year is a long time and I change so fast. And just one?! I’m not a minimalist.

The only things I can commit to for a year or more is my husband, my big silver chunky watch I wore for 20+ years, and my cream-colored boucle winter coat with the white fur collar that I sadly lost. That’s it. Everything else changes way too fast for a year commitment.

But 3 years ago I saw this funny word search on Facebook where the first word that grabs your eye is your word for the year. Several words jumped out at me and I thought that was fun so I went with it. I posted them on my vibe board and that was that.

In case you’re wondering, they were: Strong, Inspire, Purpose, Breakthrough, Health.

Uncharacteristically, I did not put a lot of intention into “making these words happen.” I felt it was a divine feminine way to accept guidance for the year. I just sat back to watch how they would play out. I leaned into the feminine energy of receiving and allowing, without trying to control or direct.

It was AMAZING to see how these words appeared throughout my year. Every one of them came up in a meaningful way that year.

I loved it so much that I chose words that way again last year. I saw 4 immediately: confidence, faith, joy & beauty. Again, the way those themes came to me and played out was divine.

This year I did the same but with a little variation.

All of December felt like a planning, prepping, dreaming, allowing month. I was very contemplative and quiet. I also had a lot of energy, despite fighting some physical bugs. Throughout the month I kept getting the words “integrate” and “expand”. They came to me from several different sources, several different times, and they were really resonating.

I can feel that this will be a year where I expand by way of integration. I don’t see me taking in a lot of new information. I feel I gathered so much knowledge in 2023 and this year is a time of integrating it all.

I decided these would be 2 of my words. But I really love the divine feminine magic of the word search so I did that too. Not a minimalist, remember? Two words popped out for me in about .7 seconds, so I have 4 words this year. I trust and know they were all brought to me.

What will I do with them? How will they play out? Dunno. It’s fun to see it all happen. I delight in the mystery of it all.

The two words that came to me in the word search were:

Magic. I was THRILLED to see that one pop out at me and can’t wait to see how magic plays into this year! It’s a huge part of my life always, but apparently it will be highlighted this year. Exciting.

Confident. Last year “confidence” was one of my words. As I reflected on the year I could see where my confidence grew in so many different ways. I spent some time thinking about the subtle difference between confident and confidence. This year I believe I will embody confidence – that is to BE confident. Not so much to gain confidence, but to BE confident. Get it?

So these are my 4 words for 2024: MAGIC, CONFIDENT, INTEGRATE, EXPAND

We think we know best what we need and we’re gonna make it happen, by god! But this exercise feels like the allowing and the trust and the faith that is an important part of the formula of living a life in devotion. A life in connection.

We may not know what we need and we don’t know what’s in store for us. This is an exercise that opens connection with the divine so you can see her power at work in your life.

It helps you remember that it’s not just you out there fightin the good fight all by yourself. You remember there is magic at play. You see that you are connected to something larger than your little human self.

So tell me – do you choose a word or words for the year? How do you do it?

If you’d like to do the word search I did, lmk and I can send it to you.

If you’d like help with direction for your year, or making your words come to life, or leaning into the divine feminine energy of trusting and allowing, I’d love to help you. Head on over to my coaching page and book a call to talk about how we could work together.

Imbolc Is Coming!

There are a few spiritual practices that I keep returning to because they ground and center me so much. One practice I LOVE is following The Celtic Wheel Of The Year.

The Wheel divides the year into 8 seasons. We are encouraged to look to nature for cues about how to come into alignment; to explore and model our inner life to align with the energies of the season.

Imbolc season starts February 1. It’s mid-winter, half way between the winter solstice and spring equinox. It may be my favorite season on The Wheel. It’s about new beginnings. And I do love me a new beginning!

It’s a time of hope. The promise of renewal. The excitement of potential.

We’re beginning to gather and plant the seeds for the next season.

We’re invited to reflect: What new beginnings are calling me? What is asking for my attention?

It’s a time for clearing and resetting of the mind and heart. Allowing inspiration to enter for the new cycle. Just basking, marinating. It’s not so much about “doing”.

We’re starting to stir from our sleepy dark winter slumber. Slowly. Like we’re just rolling over in bed, not even stretching yet. We’re staying in our cozy spot. Dreaming and planning. Listening. Feeling into what’s next.  

If you’d like some guidance on moving through this Imbolc season with intention, soulfulness & some witchy magic, schedule a discovery call with me and we’ll work out a juicy plan for you!

photo by my hubs

Truth, Copy Cats & AI

The essence of a work of art – the energy that it holds and conveys – is why it speaks to you, which is why you call it art. Right? It’s the age-old debate about what makes something “art”. This is what I think makes it “art”…at least it’s where I’m landing now.

Something bigger than the artist runs through them and into their work. Some sort of magic.

I believe what you’re responding to – whether you like it or not, or whether it sparks an emotion in you – is the energetic imprint that comes through the artist and into the work. The artist is in partnership with the Divine.

And once that energetic hits you it either sparks something or it doesn’t. And that is about both you and the frequency you’re at, and the artist and the frequency they were transmitting through and into the work.

That’s how I see it. At least right now. What do you think? I’m interested in knowing.

I think that’s why copies fall flat. Copying work does not capture or transmit the essence of it.

When someone copies, it can technically be accurate. It can be objectively beautiful. But it can’t channel the energy, the je ne sais quoi, of the original work. So that work will fall flat. It will not move you. The artist of the copy used their mind, rather than channeling magic.

I was one class short of an art minor in college. This is one of the paintings I did back then. The assignment was to find a painting that we liked and copy it. I’m sorry that I don’t know the original artist.

The exercise was meant to build our technical skills and it was a worthwhile effort. I remember the parts I struggled with. I got better at painting by doing this assignment.

But when I look at this painting I feel the biggest lesson for me wasn’t the intention of our professor. Or maybe it was.

Sure, I can see the beauty of what I created and I can appreciate how it turned out. But does this piece get to me on a visceral level? No. When I look at it do I feel the same way as when I looked at the work by the original artist. No. And no one else does either, I bet. And that’s not about technique.

While I really like this painting I did, and I really nailed some techniques, I’ve never really felt proud of it. And I never understood why.

Several times throughout the years I have seen a painting that I loved and it was several hundred or thousands of dollars and I knew I could copy it. Have you ever said – “I could do that!” I liked the works I copied. They looked good. But it didn’t really FEEL good. Ya know? It felt flat.

There is a giant John Singer Sargent painting in the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston - my absolute fav art museum. Plus there’s a great heist story about that place that makes it EVEN better to me! I love a good heist story. But I digress.

Back to the El Jaleo painting…it REALLY moves me. I have spent A.LOT. of time standing in front of that painting and taking it all in. I LOOOOOVE the way that piece makes me feel.

I have a general policy to never buy prints because I don’t feel anything when I look at a print. But I went against policy and bought that print.

It does spark a bit of the feeling of the original in me. I don’t think it’s coming through the print though. I think it’s a remnant imprint that my body stored from all the time I’ve spent with the original. Like when you hear a song that brings you right back to the emotions of the time associated with the song.

This print has hung in various homes of mine over the years and no one has ever commented on it. Except my husband who was troubled that I had a print in a fancy frame and wondered why – ha! I don’t think anyone has ever felt anything from it or appreciated it. I think that’s because the print doesn’t carry that divine essence.

This all makes me think about the AI talk that’s pervasive right now. Feels the same to me.

We humans can be fooled sometimes, for a period of time. Listen, I’ve been fooled by someone pretending to be something they really aren’t. Haven’t you?

But we can feel the truth on some level if we’re paying attention to the feelings in our body. When I stand in front of the original Sargent painting my body feels completely different from when I stand in front of my print. When I look at this watercolor painting I did in college, I don’t feel anything really. My brain has some thoughts about it, but I don’t feel anything in my body.

If we get quiet and listen, if we tune into our body and our emotions, we know the truth. We know the copy from the original. We can feel it. We can feel truth.

What does truth feel like to you?

In this world of rapidly evolving AI and social media, of copies and fakes, let’s not lose sight of the divine and what that feels like; of true human nature; of the partnership of the two. That partnership is what creates magic.

And we can feel magic.

And we can discern truth if we get quiet, listen and feel. Amen.

If you’re struggling to hear and feel the truth, I can help guide you to your inner knowing. I won’t tell you what your truth is. I don’t know that. But I do have tools to help you find it yourself. That’s my job. That’s my calling. Head over to my coaching page and schedule a call to talk about it.

Lessons From...Snoopy?

Messages and support come in many different forms.

But a drawing of Snoopy on a post it note on the floor in the corner of a coffee shop?

Yes, even that.

First a little backstory:

I was in a coaching session with a client last week at a coffee shop. He has been struggling with a job search. He doesn’t like his job but has been dragging his feet on taking action to make changes.

He had a recent breakthrough realization that some people actually ENJOY their job and that maybe he should not just look for a job that doesn’t suck (this is why he was dragging his feet btw), but what if he could have a job he actually enjoyed? This is a big jump for him.

So for a few weeks he has been dreaming – that’s the first step: What does he like to do? What is he good at? What does he do that he loves to do but doesn’t get paid for? What do people tell him he’s good at? What comes naturally to him? What does he read about? What does he lose himself in?

Now back to Snoopy:

In the middle of our session, as we’re talking about these questions and his list, he says – “I hate to interrupt but there is this sticky note on the floor in the corner behind you with a drawing of Snoopy on it. I don’t know why I feel I need to tell you that.” We laughed. We moved on.

But I believe there are no accidents or coincidences so I made a note – “Snoopy message?”

When I circled back around to study Snoopy a little deeper, I was ASTOUNDED at what I found! Get this:

“Snoopy imagines himself to speak, but never actually does. He has very articulate thoughts but they are not verbalized. He’s loyal, imaginative, and good-natured. On the whole, he shows great love, care, and loyalty. He is obsessed with cookies.”

I could write my client’s name in place of Snoopy and it would perfectly describe him!

There’s more…

“The moral of Snoopy is that big dreams lead to big things. Snoopy was the biggest dreamer of them all. His wild imagination often led to even wilder, more fantastic adventures in real life. Snoopy knew that you must have a big dream if you are going to lead a big life.”

EXACTLY the topic of our coaching the last few sessions!

And the icing on the cake - I found The Top 10 Lessons from Snoopy (from the International Reading Association):

1.     It’s ok to be afraid. Just don’t let your fears control you.

2.    Persistence wins out.

3.    It’s what you think of yourself that counts.

4.    Sometimes you need to talk.

5.    Sometimes you need to listen.

6.    Do what you love to do.

7.    It’s important to have friends that care.

8.    Big dreams lead to big things.

9.    Action creates reality.

10. Laugh every day!

This list…I could have labeled it “Top 10 Lessons From Our Coaching” and it would have fit! Maybe he could have just watched Snoopy videos instead of working with me?? Prob not. IDK, sounds like Snoopy knows what’s up.

And the very very best part: When I shared all this with my client, he said: “Snoopy was my go-to as a little boy. Had about a million different snoopy stuffed animals. Bed sheets. Halloween costumes. I still have a lot of snoopy Xmas decorations.”

WHAT?! Amazing.

Divine messages and support are everywhere if we pay attention. Even in a Snoopy drawing on a post it note on the floor in the corner of a coffee shop. The Divine is clever and she has a sense of humor. She sends messages wrapped up in the ways we can best receive them.

So here’s to Snoopy and his #1 message: BIG DREAMS LEAD TO BIG THINGS.

Amen brother Snoop-dog!

photo by cesar parcero

Call The MidwifE

I was directed to draw from Nick Bantock’s Archeo Deck this morning. As I shuffled, I asked:

What part of me wants to come forward right now? What part of me do I need to lean into?

I drew The Midwife:

“The Midwife draws from a deep font of female knowledge. She is a facilitator and an advisor to your craft. She will help you develop the lucidity of your language, give rhythm to your music, and breathe vibrancy into your painting.

With her guidance your works will be filled with vitality, but without her your attempts at creation will be as dead as clay golems.

With a firm grip on practicality, she tends us, offering experience and insight. She blows gently on the sparks of our ideas, encouraging us to carry concept to fruition.

She welcomes our births and our struggle to breathe, she feeds our never-ending hunger for truth, and she wraps us in consolation when our finest dreams collapse.

Her knife cuts the umbilical cord.

She has helped launch a million creations. She has fed the hungry artists and held the hand of the mothers and fathers.

The Midwife brings an old knowledge to the table. Her wisdom travels back through all history, and her gift is one of understanding.

She is a good mother. Wise and calm in times of danger, she carries in her chest the seeds of beauty, vitality, and life.”

Ahhhhh….THIS is what I aspire to be. THIS is the highest expression of my calling - to be a Midwife of your dreams and desires. When I read this it sparks all sorts of things in my body.

Also…I had to look up clay golems. “without The Midwife your attempts at creation will be as dead as clay golems.”  What the heck is a clay golem? Nick has all sorts of phrases I have to look up. It’s an interesting rabbit hole if you have the time and curiosity. If not, here’s the short version:

A golem is “a creature formed out of a lifeless substance such as dust or earth. Since clay was a weak vessel for life, clay golems were easily damaged.”

What that means to me is that if you’re creating without the help of the divine, your creation will fall flat, will not hold up, it will be a weak vessel.

I think we have many different Midwives in our lives. Both in divine form and human form. We mustn’t forget to ask the Midwife, in all of her various forms, for help.

If you’re needing the help of a midwife, I have my workdress on, and sensible shoes, and my black leather bag is packed with all the essential tools. Just send word and I’ll head on over to help you.

4 Connection Questions

I had an awesome brunch with an old friend the other day. It had been years since we’d been together and we hadn’t had a real and deep conversation in a long time.

We only had 2 hours together, so as I contemplated our brunch, I was clear I didn’t want to waste a second. Small talk be damned. Gots no time for that nonsense!

So I came with an agenda because I’m funny like that. But he’s my friend and knows the ways that I’m funny/weird, so he loved it and we dove right into the deep end.

It was not only fun for the two of us, but I came home and asked my husband these questions too. It lead to a really wonderful conversation with him as well. Here are my questions:

3 most significant events of the last 10 years

What are you excited about right now?

Biggest challenge right now

What’s next?

He sent me a text later that day and said: “Oh my goodness, thank you so much for the breakfast this morning. It was incredibly healing and 100% delightful.”

THAT was what I had hoped for from our time together. And we both got it.

You can borrow my questions if you want! OOOOhhhh…what fun would this be at dinner party?!

What's Calling You?

Do you have something inside of you that’s wanting to express? Maybe it doesn’t make logical sense so you ignore it. Or it’s inconvenient. Or you have other “more important” things to do.

This is one of my drawings I did when I FINALLY signed up for that charcoal drawing class I had been wanting to do for ever. Like years. Literally. I had been thinking about doing it for years. Since college.

It didn’t seem to make sense to do it at the time. Logically a million other things were “more important”. But it kept calling me. 

When I finally answered the call and signed up for the class the pay-off was huge. 

The energy and creativity and joy I got from that class gave me jet fuel for other things in life.

It gave me life and vitality.

As Brene Brown says: “Unused creativity is not benign. It turns to grief, rage, judgment, sorrow & shame.”

Do you have something that’s calling you? Something that wants to come out, to express?

Now is the time.

The Truth Within

“WOMEN MUST FOLLOW THEIR ESSENCE, LISTEN TO THE TRUTH WITHIN THEMSELVES AND ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER TO DO THE SAME. A WOMAN WHO LIVES FROM THE CORE OF HER POWER WILL ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO FOLLOW THEIR ESSENCE TOO, TO LISTEN TO THE TRUTH WITHIN THEMSELVES. OWN YOUR OWN POWER, LIVE FROM THE CENTER OF YOUR BEING.” 

– wisdom from The Grandmothers spirit guides, from the book Love Is Our Power

It’s time. You’re here at this time, in this place, for a reason. 

You have a truth inside that wants to express. 

Maybe you’re not sure where to start. How to make that truth a reality.

After years of experimenting on my own and with clients, I have nailed down a process for doing just that - for accessing the core of your power and bringing it into the material plane. A process for living from the center of your being – where your truth lies. 

I call this 6-week 1:1 coaching course “Your Best Year Yet”. And we can start anytime.

I walk you through a process for bringing your dreams into reality. We do magic and we get down to business. We use modern science and ancient wisdom.   

It’s time. This is it. We need all the humans listening to their truth and living from that place.

If you’d like help, I’d love to. Schedule a discovery call and we can talk about how best to proceed.

Winter Solstice

Today, December 21st, is Winter Solstice. The darkest day of the year. 

The darkness has been building and today is the apex. The scales tip. The light will slowly start to build again. Today we celebrate both the darkness and the return of the light. 

I follow The Celtic Wheel of the Year. It is a beautiful way to stay connected to the cycles and rhythms of the natural world. It’s easy to think we are not a part of nature, to feel disconnected from what’s going on with Mother Earth. But we are a part of the system and when we’re disconnected from the cycles and rhythms and gifts and stewardship of our natural resources, we can start to feel isolated and alone. 

The Celtic Wheel is a way to feel connected. 

Winter Solstice opens Yule season on The Celtic Wheel. The invitation during this season is for rest and quiet reflection. Restoration. Listening, dreaming, visioning. 

How can we nurture ourselves? How can we honor and invite rest?

Looking to nature for guidance, we see a slowing. The squirrels were busy in the fall preparing for winter. Now I don’t see many. The leaves have fallen and blanket the plants that appear dead. But they’re not! Well, the annuals are, but the perennials and the trees are resting - an important part of the cycle. It doesn’t look like much is going on but there is quiet and still work below the surface. This work requires no effort and is necessary. 

I love the way Karen Clark shares about Yule season in her book “The Path of She: Book of Sabbats”…

“Nature remembers what we humans have forgotten: every cycle must return to stillness, silence, the dark. Every out-breath requires an in-breath. Every outer endeavor turns back inward to its origins, its center, and begins again. From death comes new life and from the darkest night, the new dawn is born. Nature calls you to stillness and silence and the deepest mysteries of your inner world.

In the deepest dark of Winter Solstice, the light of a new dawn is born. So too the depth of your wounding births forth the shining light of your true beauty. Our life story, with its trials and wounding, is the crucible of our greater becoming and deepest beauty.

In our human world this is a season of festive gatherings and gift giving, perhaps because we need the joy and comfort of each other’s company as a solace to the heavy weight of the darkness on our hearts and psyche. The celebration of light and the miracle of rebirth are common themes this time of year across many cultures and traditions.”

And this poem by the great Wendell Berry so beautifully captures it:

To Know the Dark

by Wendell Berry

To go in the dark with a light is to know the light.

To know the dark, go dark. Go without sight,

and find that the dark, too, blooms and sings,

and is traveled by dark feet and dark wings.

In closing, here’s one more share from Karen Clark:

“The seasons of nature turn. The dark gives way to the light. The old to the new. Nothing lasts forever. In these primal truths, you can find the hope and courage to change your life and our world for the better, birthing new light and beautiful possibilities from the darkest night of your wounding and the pain and sorrow of our collective humanity.”

Here’s to the beautiful possibilities found in the dark, quiet, stillness. Happy Winter Solstice!

Living With Intention

I had a friend tell me recently that I live so intentionally. I do. I like that. I don’t want to feel like I’m bobbing along aimlessly while things happen to me. I want what I want and Imagonna get it by god!

She said she wants to be more intentional and asked me these questions/made these statements:

What are the steps?

The execution feels hard.

We all know what we want…or do we?

I have trouble choosing.

She’s a really good question asker isn’t she? I love these questions. And comments. I thought you all might like to get in on this too so here goes…the steps:

Step 1 - Make a list of what you want:

what do you want to have

who do you want to be

what emotions do you want to feel

what things do you want to do

what experiences do you want to have

what relationships do you want to develop

Is this overwhelming? Then just pick one. That’s all you need to get started. You don’t want the execution to be too hard.

Sometimes it is. I’m not gonna lie. Like last night. I didn’t do any of the things I know make me feel good. I was not intentional in the least. I watched mindless TV for an hour and a half. Not a show I was craving, just mindless. And afterwards…I didn’t feel good. That’s gonna happen. Today is a new day.

Do you see how I used a mindset tool there – don’t get all dramatic with your thinking. None of this: “I’m just not cut out for this, I’m not that kind of person, I never do what I say I’m gonna do, I’m lazy, This is no use, I’m a hot mess.”…none of that. Those are just stories you tell yourself. If you want your life to be different then tell yourself a different story.

And btw- I did note how I felt when I wasn’t intentional and I didn’t like it. That is motivation to keep choosing intentionality. Make a note to yourself what feels good and what doesn’t.

Back to the steps… Now that you know what you want,

Step 2: What feeling does that elicit?

Here’s an example:

At the start of the summer I was craving that freedom feeling. The one I had when I was young and riding my bike, Summer Blonde, all over the countryside with not a care in the world. My white bike basket with the bright plastic daisies and the fringies on the handles. My cute tiny shorts and my halter top. My long hair blowing in the breeze because we didn’t care about head injuries. That feeling. You know the one. THAT was what I wanted.

Really get in there to those memories and FEEL it. Bring it up in your body and mind.

Step 3: Now brainstorm a list of how to get it

My list was “Summer Dreams – my summer of freedom”. I wrote down activities that gave me that feeling: kayaking, having friends over on the deck, pool time, taking my mom on drives through the country side, bike rides, concerts, making craft AF cocktails, you get the idea. The picture above was one of my adventures!

Step 4: Include all your senses in your plan

Think of hitting all the senses of that feeling you want. I made a playlist – That Freedom Feeling – of songs that give me that feeling. Taste was summer AF cocktails, I made a Pinterest board with the summer freedom vibe, linen was my summer wardrobe theme, I literally stopped to smell the roses.

Step 5: Put your plans in your planner.

Each Sunday when I was planning my week I would make sure I had at least one of the activities from my list on my calendar. That’s the “choosing” part. Just pick one activity. Don’t complicate it. I kept my Summer Dreams list visible to keep me on track. My daughter and her friend thought it was funny.

Step 6: Bask in that feeling. Baste yourself with it, in the spirit of Thanksgiving.

When it came time for the activity I would make sure to feel that feeling in my body, I would recall that freedom feeling and feel it. I would note that feeling during the activity, and I would remember it and feel the feeling afterwards. In other words, I practiced that feeling a lot. I basked in it. I CREATED that freedom feeling.

THIS was a smashing success!

I didn’t get to every activity on my list. But I did a lot of them. I felt like I got what I wanted out of the summer. I felt that freedom feeling alot.

This week I started a Cozy Winter list. That’s the feeling I want to create this winter. I’m also thinking I want to include “vibrant” because I don’t want to sit on the couch all winter ;-). I’m thinking outdoor winter activities would be fun. So maybe “Vibrant & Cozy Winter”.

I started a Pinterest board to go along with it. Pictures that elicit that feeling I want when I look at them. I’m thinking about a winter candle & a diffuser blend, a new blanket for the couch, a warm knit hat for my vibrant outdoor activities, maybe a fun winter photo on my mirror, a winter tea blend.

So here’s the summary for living with intention:

1. What do you want? Refer to the questions up there ^. Just choose one.

2. Feel the feelings of it- what are the emotions and how does it physically feel in your body?

3. Make a list of how to create what you want– actual actions.

4. Hit all the senses with what you’re creating. That makes it more powerful.

5. Put those actions on your calendar each week.

6. Bask in the feeling of the things you do– before, during & after.

This is how I live intentionally. There are nuances of course, and I have many other tools of intentionality that I use. But this is an easy & fun one and it will get you on your way.

If you’d like help with the execution you can schedule a coaching appointment and I can walk you through it. I love this stuff!

Let me know how you live with intention. I wanna hear it! And what’s your winter vibe this year?

Creating Connection

I’ve felt a little disconnected lately. Slightly off. You?

So I came back to a morning blessing that helps me elevate out of my human monkey mind and into a higher consciousness. It creates a sacred space and helps me to instantly feel connected to the divine. It works. It’s helping.

It’s a Q’ero Blessing called “Honor The Four Directions”

Here it is:

To the Winds of the South, Great Serpent

Mother of the life giving waters

Wrap your coils of light around me

Remind me of how to let go and shed old ways of being

Teach me to walk the way of beauty

To the Winds of the West, Mother Jaguar

Support me as I see my own fears

Teach me how to transform my fears into love

Remind me of how to live with impeccability

May I have no enemies in the lifetime or the next.

To the Winds of the North, Royal Hummingbird, Ancient Ones.

Teach me about your endurance and your great joy

Come to me in the dreamtime, with honor I greet you.

To the Winds of the East, Eagle, Condor

Great Visionary, remind me to lead from my pure heart

Teach me to soar to new places, to fly wing to wing with Spirit

Mother Earth, Pachamama, I pray for your healing

May I soften into your wisdom

May I take great care of you so that my children

And my children’s children

May witness the beauty and abundance you offer me today.

Father Sun, Grandmother Moon, Star Nations

Great Spirit, you who are known by a thousand names

and you who are the unnamable One

thank you for bringing me here at this time.

It is instructed to take a few deep breaths to align before you begin the blessing. Face each direction as you read, holding your hand up to that direction. Keep your other palm open to receive. I sometimes put that palm on my heart. For Mother Earth, put one hand on the ground. For Father Sky, raise both hands to the sky. After each direction I pause and take a deep breath, really receiving the energy into my body.

It really realigns my energy. It’s quite magical.

If you’d like help, or more like this, you can schedule a 1:1 coaching session with me. I love to help people connect to the divine and find their magic again.

Cricket Wisdom & Medicine

I have a wild and crazy and fun story about Cricket.

Over the last 3 years of City Cricket’s existence the symbolism and meaning of Cricket have continued to be revealed to me at deeper and deeper levels.

My husband came up with the name seemingly randomly. Of course we know nothing is random. But the name really resonated with me. I wasn’t totally sure why but I loved it. You can read about the first layer of the name story here. I won’t go into that today. This is about a deeper level that was just revealed to me.

This morning I was drawn to look up cricket in Alyson Charles’ book “Animal Power”. And HOLY MOLY batman…wow.za.

Here’s what I found there:

The energy and symbolism of Cricket:

“desirable outcomes, good fortune, mystical song, frequency raising, courageous new heights, integrity, divine discernment.”

I feel that Cricket has led me into all of these qualities. And that is where I’m called to guide you. If you are called to step into the City Cricket space, this is what will happen there. This is what will unfold for you. This is why I’m here – to be the guide for you to evolve in these areas.

But wait! There’s more! A lot more. Back to Alyson’s message…

When to work with me (Cricket & Tracy):

“When you want to seize big opportunities, when you want to express your soul’s purpose, when you want to want to be filled with integrity, when you want high vibrations, when you need clarity on decisions, when you want to open your heart.”

This is what I wanted and needed for myself when I started City Cricket. I called in the energy of Cricket (unbeknownst to me until now) to help me deepen into each of these wants and needs.

This is what City Cricket offers you as well. It was like City Cricket was already in existence. I believe that. She was like a house that carried these vibrations, this wisdom, this medicine, these lessons, and I stepped into her. I’ve made my home here and gotten really cozy and I now invite you into this space to receive what she has to offer.

I invite you into this house, I serve you a special drink, I offer you the food I make with love, I give you a blanket and a comfortable place to sit, I have a candle burning. It smells good here. I am here as the person inviting you into this house that is City Cricket. But this space exists with or without me.

You know how you go into a space - a room, a house, a studio, a garden, a backyard - and you FEEL the personality and energy of the space? You can tell the owner/occupier/steward of the space has added their personality to it. You can feel their energy is there too. But you also somehow know that the space in and of itself is a living breathing thing. The person could not have created the same energy or qualities in a different location. It’s the combination of the human’s personality and the energy and qualities of the space that come together to create a new thing.

That’s how I see City Cricket.

Back to Alyson’s message from Cricket…

Cricket’s energy medicine:

“I am known for my voice and song. I help you find your voice and discover your unique song.

I am a protector of what is positive. Call upon me to bring forward a vibration-lifting experience in your life.

Transparency and integrity are my main medicines. I am here to remind you that it is better to be honest and real. Transparency is clear energy and provides a clear path. Manipulation and delusions create fog, chaos, and distortion. Staying true to what you know is right will always provide unexpected miracles.

I can help awaken your spiritual gifts, life dream analysis, chakra healing, aura or energy readings, and more. Call upon me when you’re ready to connect to your spiritual potential.

Are you expressing your heart? Are you holding back on love? Remember your true power and greatest guidance system live in your heart center. Don’t let them lay dormant.

Now is a ripe time of higher possibilities for you. What is presenting in your life that you should take the leap toward?”

As I’m reading this, I can feel Cricket talking to me back then, and now still. These have been my main areas of growth. This is a lifetime of evolving and shedding and calling in.

I also feel that I am saying these words to you. I am inviting you into the City Cricket space and this is what you will find here.

City Cricket is more than just me. It has my personality and flavor because I am the human occupying it. But the spirit of Cricket works through me and with you in this space.

Before every session with clients, and before I start my work in the morning, I say a prayer. I ask that Spirit work through me. I ask that I put my ego aside and that I become a pure channel for what wants to express through my human body that will serve your highest good.

If something called to you when reading this invitation, if you felt a knowing or a quickening in your body, trust that. It’s Cricket calling you. I invite you into the City Cricket house where I’ll serve you and nourish you. It would be my honor and pleasure to have you as my guest here.

photo cred: dmitry grigoriev, via unsplash.com

darkness & light

I share this painting with permission from my favorite artist and friend, Amy Kirchner. 

I was drawn to it a few weeks ago and asked her if I could share it. Imagine my surprise & delight when she explained that it’s a visual depiction of this darkness & light topic I’ve been contemplating!

Here’s what she has to say about this painting:

“Untitled Bright Gold was painted in the winter. In winter, like many people, I turn more inward. I crave more light and support in my environment. In this work I painted to provide light with bright gold on the right side, with the negative on the left, the other side of the coin. The small dark area a counterpart to the illumined right side, a necessary companion as the light could not be as radiant if it existed alone.”

YEEESSSSSSS! The dark area is a “counterpart, a necessary companion”. If you took one of them away from this painting, the power wains. That’s my experience anyway. Hold your hand over one part and see how your body responds. For me it feels like it flattens the energy. But both of them together - POWWW-EEEEE!!!!!

Thanks Amy, for offering your gifts to the world. Here’s the audio, if you’d like to hear Amy’s voice. And here’s her website for more of her work.

you are not your emotions

I had a rich discussion with a pranic healing client last week about darkness and light. We talked about being open to the full range of emotions.

The timing was exquisite as we have just entered the Samhain season on The Celtic Wheel. The invitation this time of year is to let go of what is no longer needed, which requires exploring the darkness, the negative space. 

Are you afraid of darkness?

The veil between the seen and unseen worlds is said to be thinnest this time of year. Many cultures have rituals to connect with ancestors and loved ones who have passed. It’s Scorpio season, she reminded me, and little scary creatures visit. 

But there is richness and learning in the dark scary spaces. And WE decide if they’re dark & scary, or if they’re interesting and full of gifts & growth. 

I met with 2 clients this week who are wrestling with not wanting to feel “dark” or “negative” feelings: shame, disappointment, grief, regret. 

They want to hand pick the emotions they feel and prefer only the light and happy ones. They just jam those unwanted feelings down.

Believe me, I get that! I’ve been there. For most of my living years, in fact.

In my Mindset workshop last Friday we had a discussion about feeling emotions and how you are not your emotions. One participant challenged me on that - she said, “If I’m sad and can’t get out of bed, then I am depressed. That’s who I am.” 

To which I replied: would you agree that you are <insert her name…Jane, we’ll say>. 

J: Yes.

T: And if you are sad, are you still Jane?

J: Yes.

T: And if you are angry, are you still Jane?

J: Yes.

T: And if you are frustrated, are you still Jane?

J: Yes. Especially then :-).

You get the idea?

Emotions are a part of the human experience. All of them. Emotions are not you, they are something you experience. They come and go. As humans we WILL experience the full range of them. If we try to ignore or hide from or repress an emotion, then we will see that emotion everywhere. Everything will be colored by that emotion.

If you are avoiding grief, everywhere you look you see things to grieve.

If you are avoiding fear, everywhere you look you find things to be afraid of.

If you are avoiding disappointment, nothing lives up to your expectations. Everything is a disappointment.

You feel that?

There is also a mountain of research that shows repressed emotions make you sick. Physically ill. They WILL come out somewhere, somehow. You cannot repress them indefinitely. They are persistent little buggers. They WILL be expressed.

I work with clients on a process to feel an emotion. You won’t be pulled under by it if you allow it. You won’t get stuck in it…that’s what I used to think! IF you actually FEEL it. Explore it. But if you keep resisting it, you WILL stay stuck.

Isn’t that what they say about quicksand? If you struggle, it actually sucks you in MORE and you become stuck.

And where exactly IS quicksand? When you were a kid didn’t that seem like one of the top worries you would have as an adult - avoiding quicksand and how to survive if you accidentally stumbled into it? Have you heard John Mulaney do that bit?!  Hilarious!

If this resonates, if you’re afraid of the darker emotions, I’d love to help you feel an emotion that you know you’re resisting. It’s easier than you think. You can schedule a 1:1 coaching session with me and I’ll lead you through it. 

Thoughts Feelings Actions Outcomes

Thoughts create feelings (emotions).

Those feelings create actions.

Those actions create your outcomes.

This is a mindset formula that I learned in the 80s. I still believe it’s true. I’ve seen evidence of it over and over and over again.

I have studied this standard formula deeper over the years, picked it apart, questioned it, worked through it for myself and with clients, read different theories, listened to different experts...it’s been my obsession for a long time.

While I still think it’s true, I have found some important nuances and common pitfalls.

If you just look at the simple formula you might be tempted to try to just try to think happy thoughts and expect your life to be the perfect highlights reel. That doesn’t work. I tried it.

It’s kind of right, but not totally.

What creates the thought in the first place? Our thoughts come from the programming that happened in childhood - family & cultural messages- spoken and unspoken, experiences we had, and what we saw happening around us.

That programming lives in our subconscious and forms our beliefs, which create our thoughts. We assume these beliefs are all true. We don’t even question them.

Do not despair if you don’t like your programming - neuroscience shows us we can rewire our brain! We can look at and change our core beliefs.

Then there are theories that say repressed emotions actually create thoughts – a book called “Letting Go”, by David R Hawkins. I find this is also true.

See how the nuances to that simple formula are important?

Then there are the behaviorist theories that say action drives your thoughts and feelings – a trip to the gym, helping someone in need, and spring cleaning all prove this to ALSO be true.

So I have decided not to get caught up in which causes what so much as the simple awareness of our thoughts, and our feelings and our actions. Once we have clear awareness, we can choose the correct intervention that will give us the changes we desire.

It’s not that complicated really, once you get the hang of it.

I often work with clients on the thoughts-feelings-actions formula and how to use it to create the life they want. We look at our thoughts and challenge the beliefs that create them. We look at our emotions and question where they came from, which ones are we resisting? And we look at our actions, or inactions, to see if they align with what we want.

So if you’re feeling bleh, heavy, anxious, or if life just doesn’t quite feel like it’s the best it could be, maybe this is a tool you need to pick up and learn how to use. I’d be honored to help you.

photo cred: hunter haley via unsplash.com