I had a friend tell me recently that I live so intentionally. I do. I like that. I don’t want to feel like I’m bobbing along aimlessly while things happen to me. I want what I want and Imagonna get it by god!
She said she wants to be more intentional and asked me these questions/made these statements:
What are the steps?
The execution feels hard.
We all know what we want…or do we?
I have trouble choosing.
She’s a really good question asker isn’t she? I love these questions. And comments. I thought you all might like to get in on this too so here goes…the steps:
Step 1 - Make a list of what you want:
what do you want to have
who do you want to be
what emotions do you want to feel
what things do you want to do
what experiences do you want to have
what relationships do you want to develop
Is this overwhelming? Then just pick one. That’s all you need to get started. You don’t want the execution to be too hard.
Sometimes it is. I’m not gonna lie. Like last night. I didn’t do any of the things I know make me feel good. I was not intentional in the least. I watched mindless TV for an hour and a half. Not a show I was craving, just mindless. And afterwards…I didn’t feel good. That’s gonna happen. Today is a new day.
Do you see how I used a mindset tool there – don’t get all dramatic with your thinking. None of this: “I’m just not cut out for this, I’m not that kind of person, I never do what I say I’m gonna do, I’m lazy, This is no use, I’m a hot mess.”…none of that. Those are just stories you tell yourself. If you want your life to be different then tell yourself a different story.
And btw- I did note how I felt when I wasn’t intentional and I didn’t like it. That is motivation to keep choosing intentionality. Make a note to yourself what feels good and what doesn’t.
Back to the steps… Now that you know what you want,
Step 2: What feeling does that elicit?
Here’s an example:
At the start of the summer I was craving that freedom feeling. The one I had when I was young and riding my bike, Summer Blonde, all over the countryside with not a care in the world. My white bike basket with the bright plastic daisies and the fringies on the handles. My cute tiny shorts and my halter top. My long hair blowing in the breeze because we didn’t care about head injuries. That feeling. You know the one. THAT was what I wanted.
Really get in there to those memories and FEEL it. Bring it up in your body and mind.
Step 3: Now brainstorm a list of how to get it
My list was “Summer Dreams – my summer of freedom”. I wrote down activities that gave me that feeling: kayaking, having friends over on the deck, pool time, taking my mom on drives through the country side, bike rides, concerts, making craft AF cocktails, you get the idea. The picture above was one of my adventures!
Step 4: Include all your senses in your plan
Think of hitting all the senses of that feeling you want. I made a playlist – That Freedom Feeling – of songs that give me that feeling. Taste was summer AF cocktails, I made a Pinterest board with the summer freedom vibe, linen was my summer wardrobe theme, I literally stopped to smell the roses.
Step 5: Put your plans in your planner.
Each Sunday when I was planning my week I would make sure I had at least one of the activities from my list on my calendar. That’s the “choosing” part. Just pick one activity. Don’t complicate it. I kept my Summer Dreams list visible to keep me on track. My daughter and her friend thought it was funny.
Step 6: Bask in that feeling. Baste yourself with it, in the spirit of Thanksgiving.
When it came time for the activity I would make sure to feel that feeling in my body, I would recall that freedom feeling and feel it. I would note that feeling during the activity, and I would remember it and feel the feeling afterwards. In other words, I practiced that feeling a lot. I basked in it. I CREATED that freedom feeling.
THIS was a smashing success!
I didn’t get to every activity on my list. But I did a lot of them. I felt like I got what I wanted out of the summer. I felt that freedom feeling alot.
This week I started a Cozy Winter list. That’s the feeling I want to create this winter. I’m also thinking I want to include “vibrant” because I don’t want to sit on the couch all winter ;-). I’m thinking outdoor winter activities would be fun. So maybe “Vibrant & Cozy Winter”.
I started a Pinterest board to go along with it. Pictures that elicit that feeling I want when I look at them. I’m thinking about a winter candle & a diffuser blend, a new blanket for the couch, a warm knit hat for my vibrant outdoor activities, maybe a fun winter photo on my mirror, a winter tea blend.
So here’s the summary for living with intention:
What do you want? Refer to the questions up there ^. Just choose one.
Feel the feelings of it- what are the emotions and how does it physically feel in your body?
Make a list of how to create what you want– actual actions.
Hit all the senses with what you’re creating. That makes it more powerful.
Put those actions on your calendar each week.
Bask in the feeling of the things you do– before, during & after.
This is how I live intentionally. There are nuances of course, and I have many other tools of intentionality that I use. But this is an easy & fun one and it will get you on your way.
If you’d like help with the execution you can schedule a coaching appointment and I can walk you through it. I love this stuff!
Let me know how you live with intention. I wanna hear it! And what’s your winter vibe this year?